Have we placed more importance on defining our niche rather then finding our true calling in life?
That is a journey I plan on discovering for myself.
I’ve really been struggling about whether or not to write this post because truth be told, even though I am 30 years old I still care too much about what other people think.
I’ve only been blogging in my little piece of the internet for a few months now and I am already feeling the itch to expand the topics that I write about. Of course from a blogging perspective that is so risky and I know it. I’ve been told over and over again that you should pick a niche and only write about those topics. So even though the “niche” I have been under would be the home decor/diy/organization genre, my days have been spent researching, learning and reflecting on anything but.
Scrolling mindlessly through my Instagram feed each day seeing one jaw dropping home after another looking for some sort of connection, I can’t seem to find one in the sea of everything that looks perfectly photoshopped and completely unattainable in my regular life. Yes there is meaning behind these posts so I am not saying they are superficial at all. I am just having a hard time connecting to it and I know I’m not the only one.
Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy organizing, decorating and making our home a pleasant place to live. But I am really starting to feel like those topics are more of the backdrop of our lives and not our true passion.
And even while typing this now I second guess myself. I don’t want anyone who is passionate about home decor, party planning or organization to think I don’t deem those worthy of value. Quite the opposite in fact! Where do you think I got the inspiration on how to decorate, party plan or organize? From you!
Then there’s the whole question of if that isn’t my niche, then what is?
I am Not defined by a niche
With each passing day as my little family grows, my thoughts and opinions on parenting evolve too. With every book I read, every podcast I listen to and every chat I have with a friend, I gain a small bit of wisdom and grow as a woman pursuing Christ, a wife, and an equipping mother.
But I am too scared to share my thoughts on parenting and our family because we just don’t fit under one umbrella 100% of the time.
Can I truly call myself a minimalist if I only sort of follow Project 333? If I’ve been working on purchasing more sustainable clothing but still buy my daughter’s wardrobe at Old Navy?
Can I truly say we are eating real food if we chose to eat ice cream every once in a while? If I know that it’s filled with fake ingredients but I eat it any way?
Can I truly say we are a screen-free family if my daughter FaceTimes with my parents nearly every day? If she watches a movie when she has a babysitter because I’ve decided that is a battle that I don’t want to pick?
Can I truly say I am a Montessorian if we’re only just starting out and I still haven’t been able to reconcile “work” on open shelving with MY personal need for order? Or what if my children each have beautiful wall murals in their room which is considered distracting and very much un-Montessori?
Can I truly say I am a gentle parent if I am no longer co-sleeping with my 5 month old because him sleeping in his own room is so much more restful for our whole family? What if I’ve been known to let him cry a few minutes here or there while I take a shower or pee?!
And the list goes on.
I think the biggest question I ask myself is can I still share my opinions on topics that I don’t follow completely 100% of the time? For some reason I have told myself that the thoughts I have and the wisdom I have gained isn’t valuable simply because it doesn’t comply with any one philosophy all the time.
What am I Passionate About?
I’ve noticed that when people are passionate about something it can come across like that is the only way and if you aren’t following 100% you’re somehow less than. Oh no that is never said outright! It’s just in the little comments made. Over time, hearing and reading those little comments add up. Sure, everyone is entitled to their own opinions. So why do I take their opinions as a personal reflection of some sort of perceived short coming of my own?
Once I remember reading someone’s opinion on floor beds. This person did not like the house frame option that I’m sure you’ve seen all over Pinterest. I thought to myself, “Oh wow, I really wanted my husband to make that type of bed for our daughter’s room. Should we not do that now? Does the style of the bed chosen mean I’m following more or less of the Montessori philosophy? Once we complete it, should I not even share it with others?“
After I played that out in my head for a bit I stopped. Why am I letting one person’s opinion dictate my life?! We all don’t have to agree on everything. I am not some how less than because I have different tastes.
The point is that the bed is functional and is moving my daughter towards independence. Will the house frame bed achieve that? Most definitely. Isn’t that what matters?
You know the negative self-talk I’m speaking of here. We all have it. Why do we do this to ourselves? We all have a deep need to feel connected to others. Why does this lead us to believe that we have to fit into one box in order to be accepted by others who are also sitting in that box?
Discovering My Calling
What I’ve seen these past few months is that what I am truly passionate about is sharing my heart and helping others feel brave enough to do the same. That is my calling.
This little blog will still mirror our life. I’ll still post on parties we’ve had, projects we’ve created or organization in our home because those things are a part of our family’s journey. But it won’t be just that. It will be honesty about motherhood, encouragement (whether you’re completely in the box or not) and a big cheer for the imperfect. Because that’s my real life. It’s sometimes messy, it’s nearly never photoshop ready but it’s always meaningful. Full of authenticity, full of hope and full of love.
Will you follow along with me?
From my home sweet home to yours,